Do Not Read! If You Read This, It Will Automatically Self Destruct! Love, Dr. Elemis Pott

I went through thousands of old letters yesterday.  Some I didn't know I had.  Like a card with a big hart that says,

Elemis.  You are sweet.  Love Grant.

Who the heck is Grant?
Oh well-thanks Grant.  Glad to know I've had at least had one not-very-secret admirer.
One was note on a little slip of paper with a drawing of my stuffed monkey, and in my brother's handwriting it said:

This monkey will have to witness the bears!🙊

Here's one I hid in Marry Poppins's room once:

hiy mery!  this is from you little sister Elemis😈 I was bord again so wrote you a nuther letter.  hopefully you will not find this for severl weeks.  that would be cool!  well, I'll see if it werks, toDay is monday 10 september 2012.  What year is now 2015?  that would be really cool.  see you!!!😎

Marry found the note a day later.
And I found my favorite thank you note I've ever received in my whole life:

Dear Elemis:
Thank you for teaching me.  Your so so so so so so kind.  Your an obeydiant girl.  Your so so sweet.  Thank you for loving me and and all the other kids.  I appreciate it.  I hope you like this card and I also hope you have a very very very very very good Christmas.

Here the first letter I wrote to some of my first and best friends:

Thank you for beeing my friend.

I found a reply to that note.  It said:

Thank you for being my friend to.

Our letters sense then grown quite more...explosive.  They all had a certain pattern that basically went like this:

FOR DR. ELEMIS'S EYES ONLY!!
My Spy-Like Friend, Elemis,
How are you?  It was great getting to hang out with you the other day and write a script.  Our script is pretty kind of a little bit epic.
Yeah, we're teens now.  It's so weird.  I don't know if it's a good thing.  At least now I have an excuse when I do something wrong.
Our new movie we're making is awesome.
How's Thursday classes going for you?  Personally I liked getting captured by ninjas and scaring each other in the dark and blowing up the annex.  Again.  That's always my favorite.
Laters!
-Your Spy Like Friend.
Ps, Horray the play is over!!!!  We are free!!!
Pps, Your spelling isn't bad!
Ppps, Actually you spelled my name wrong...
Pppps, Okay.  I'm done now.

Here's a note from me.  To you.  Right now.

WARNING! 

NEVER write poems for Dr. Elemis Pott.  She has a terrible allergy to poems written for her, that causes severe eye watering, sniffing, and throat clogging.

I will now NOT share any poems written by the friends of Dr. Elemis Pott because of this reason.

(I have a terrible soft spot for things written for me).

Any way.

My friend Squimp sums up this post very beautifully in a letter I once received from her:

This card is intended for the eyes of Dr. Elemis Pott ONLY.  Anyone who reads this that is not Dr. Elemis Pott has exactly 18 hours left to live.  Starting...NOW.💀

Dr. Elemis Pott, 

I just wanted to inform you that I am going for the word record in, "Lastest thank you card ever delivered." Yup.  It's a legitimate thing and it is held very highly in Bejin.  I just thought you should know that.  

Also, I am going for the "Forgetful friend award." It's a big thing in Turkey.

So there you have it.  You just got a lesson in world history AND a lame excuse for my malfunctioning brain all in one tiny card.  Congratulations.  And since I spent so much card space talking about these very serious matters...I had to include another card to continue my ramblings...

So here we are Dr. Elemis...On the second Page.  May I just say two things.  One, that these cards are inconveniently small and they will not fit my excessive card talk.  And two, I am writing this a at 10:30 pm.  Which will be 10:30 last night now as you are reading this. 

Wow!  Okay!  Shut up brain!  Back to what this is card is actually for!  Thank you for the gift!

Now I have to end this note before I have to add a third card.  

Thank you!

Love, Squimp💜

M.R.P.S. (More Random P.S)

Don't you just love how a bunch of words looks written out in a a card?  Like if you just stare at it?  OK, I'm really done now...

OR AM I??

Random words of wisdom from Squimp:

I feel like cards and letters are little time-machines.  Someone write the words on one day.  And another person reads those same words a different day.  So those words are preserved inside the envelope, and with those words are a tiny piece of the past.