Burning Paper Walls

SPOILER ALERT:  This blog post contains movie spoilers.  But you haven't watching these films, for goodness sakes, you probably deserve it.

A man named Truman lives in a perfect neighbor hood.  Everyone dresses perfect and acts perfect.  He is safe and comfortable and happy and has everything he needs and wants. 

Facts about Truman:  1:  His father drowned.  2:  He's terrified of the water.  3:  He wants to leave.

And everything in his perfect life compiles against him to make sure that he stays where he's happy and comfortable.

Little Truman:  "I want to be an explorer!"

Teacher:  *Pulling down a map* "Oh, you're too late.  Everything's been explored."

Captain McCrea lives on a Space Ship with the rest of humanity.  The earth got too trashed, it was too hard to clean, so they left it for a better life.  Here on the space ship he is safe, comfortable, and has everything he needs to be happy.  No one has to move.  No one has to work.  All is safe and convenient.  

A few facts concerning Captain McCrea:  1:  He has a fascination with plant life.  2:  He wants to go back to earth.  3:  Going back to earth is strictly prohibited...By the dweeb who programmed the space ship.

I am not the one to be making this blog post.  I'm in the same ship as these men.  (All the pun intended).  But even worse, I lie.  I have so much fun acting fearless.  Doesn't matter if I'm a bad actress.  If I deceive myself , then I have succeeded. 

I lie to myself, 

Saying I do the best that I can, 

Shrug it off, 

Like it ain't nothing, 

Like it's out of my hands, 

And get ticked off when ever I see it affecting my plans.

-NF

Laziness grows on me like fungus.  It boils me at medium heat until I'm asleep, then grows hotter, and hotter.  

Comfort says, "It's your choice that matters."  

Comfort says, "Do what makes you happy.  That's what matters."  When someone hurts my feelings, I like hurting them.  That makes me happy.  And it's my happiness that matters, right? 

You can kill your unborn child.  But it's okay, because it's your choice.  Because you're choosing a more comfortable life for yourself.  Right?

Well what if doesn't matter.  What if it makes you more comfortable, but it just.  Doesn't.  Matter.

Not all comfort is bad.  It's submitting to comfort, serving comfort, becoming a slave to comfort that will kill you.  

I sleep with stuffed animals and I love tea and fuzzy blankets and movies.  And none of those things are bad.  But none of those things give me true comfort either.

I love friends.  I love compliments.  I love hugs.  I love reassurance.  I love feeling accepted.  All good things.  But none of these things leave me with true comfort.

I love God.  Before God created the universe, he thought, "You know what?  I'm going to make a Dr. Elemis Pott."  And that comforts me.  He didn't look down years later and says, "Woops!  Where'd she come from?  Did I make that?"  

God gives me purpose.  Purpose gives me hope.  Hope gives me comfort.  And God is the God of comfort.  That's the only comfort that matters, the only thing I'm actually lost without.  

I was talking to a friend yesterday, about how it's when we think we're so good with people when God sticks us in a group and situation where we are most uncomfortable.  And usually, that's exactly where he needs us.

In Ecuador, I was watching little kids.  This was my happy zone.  I didn't have to speak their language.  We just kicked around empty cans, made sure no one died and had a jolly o'l time.  That's why I went on this trip. 

Description:  Need someone energetic and playful to watch kids during the medical check ups and gospel sharing.  Ha!  That's something I can do!

But one morning, our team leader came up to us and said, "We need someone else to come and evangelize."  

And I heard myself say, "Sure, okay."  While everything else in my body screamed against me.  I was sat down in front of an 81 year old lady and told to share the gospel with a pencil and paper.  I remember turning to my translator and asking, "Cool...How do I...Do it?"

"Chat a bit, share your testimony and then share the gospel."

"Oh ya.  Cool.  My...Testimony..."

I had to repeat this about five more times.  It was probably the most embarrassing moments of my life.  If I had said something offensive and gotten assassinated, I wouldn't have minded too much.

I repeated the process once more that day, this time with a young boy about my age.  After my gappy-stuttery-awkward-pause-infected-cartoon-illustrated version of the gospel story, the boy accepted Christ into his heart...

I spent my lunch break in the outdoor bathroom composed of slabs of metal and wood, crying like a baby and saying, "God, that was miserable.  But if you want me to, I'll do it again."

I'm weak as rubbish.  But as my Little Bro Man once illustrated, "The less we make of ourselves, the more room God has to work."

Our comfort zones will kill us, or kill others, or both.  Little decisions to be lazy create a foundation that encases you in a coffin of warmth.

Truman's artificial world is surrounded by water, in attempted to keep him contained in his home town by fear. 

One day, Truman's "Friend" (an actor in his TV show who acts as his friend) is sent by the Director to go to Truman's house.  His friend, after searching the house, breaks character, turns to the hidden TV camera and says, "He's gone!"

Truman is on a boat, sailing away.  The Director, in shock, goes to drastic measures to make Truman sail back.  He sends a human made storm, nearly drowning him on live television.  Truman get's up.  Dumps the water out of his boat, and keeps sailing. 

Then, Truman hits the wall.  The end of his makeshift world.  Now, the director has no choice but to tell Truman that his life was a TV show.  That he had attempted to create a world that was free of worry, free from darkness, free from evil.  Truman stands at the exit door, turns to face the audience, and says, 

"And if I don't see you again, good afternoon, good morning and goodnight."  He bows.  And leaves.  Truman wins.

.   

Captain McCrea is told that there is no life on earth.  This is proven wrong.

He makes his decision.  He's going home.  The only problem is, he has to battle the will of his Otto pilot, who has taken over the ship.  This is not a difficult task for Otto.  It's a space ship against a jelly man who doesn't even have the strength to stand.

Captain McCrea is thrown to the ground.  The battle is lost.

Until the Captain stands.  And the flubbery audience goes wild.  McCrea wins.

"I don't want to survive!  I want to live!"

-Captain McCrea

And as we danced among the ashes of our lives, 

We laughed it off.

And as burned our tiny worlds

And found the ocean just beyond

Those paper walls.

-Radical Face, the Ship in Port 

Now everybody's gonna die, 

Don't everybody live though.

-NF, Oh Lord

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

-James 1:12