All the Worlds a Stage

All the worlds a stage, and all the men and women merely players.  They have their exits, and their entrances.

-Shakespeare-As You Like It-Jacqueline

I played Jacqueline the melancholy hobo at a Shakespeare camp.  Like most actresses, I was little disappointed at first when I saw the cast list.  Jacqueline was a side roll.  She didn't keep the plot going any.  She was there solely for humor relief.  As I saw the Jacqueline, she was sassy.  Unromantic.  Discouraging.  Dramatic.  Selfish.  Unsocial.  Overly sensitive.  

Me all the way.

I often get the parts I don't want, and very rarely the main role.  Of course, I go through the 'poor me' stage, memorize my lines, do my role, and by the end of the performance I forget that I even wanted a bigger part.  All the parts I ever been have all turned out so much better and so much funner then I could ever imagine.  I don't regret any of it.  

My first official play where I got to act on stage was the 'Pilgrim Play.'  When I found out that I was going to be in a play, I couldn't keep my self still.  I went insane with excitement.  

I tried out for two little girl parts, and I received two old men.

I cried for days.  

My life was over.

The play went horribly.  Practice was insane.  Have you ever heard that with bad dress rehearsals comes a perfect performance?  Or something?  Well in this case we had both a bad dress rehearsal and a bad performance. 

And I had a totally blast.

It was one of the best times of my life.  I experienced the stage thrill for the first time.  I had fun with my old men parts.  I made the best friends ever, who can sympathize when I rant about how horrible the play was.

Seems like after every performance, I feel so much better about my self and that I've accomplished so much.

But my last performance went...odd.

I was in a talent show.  I had more then one performance; a dance, a song, and a poem. 

Me and my brother completed our dance.  Crowd cheered.  Everyone said we did amazing.

We completed our song.  Crowd cheered.  I took a solo at one point, so I got less complements, but it still went well.

I went up to recite my poem.  I shook, and there was an electric feeling in my stomach, but that's what happens before all of my performances.  I recited, 'The Tale of a Hopeful End' which I posted here a while back.

I got past the chorus, and the poem was gone.  

I drew a blank.

Forgetting my lines is something I don't do often, and it seems like I always pull through.  Me One screamed:  "YOU IDIOT!!! You were praying for so long that this would 'speak to the audience' and you just failed the whole thing!"

Me Two looked at Me One and said, "No I didn't."

And I finished the poem, "Because what seems so unreal, One day might find to heal.  And that's a hope you'll never steal."

I walk off stage thinking, "Now what?  Cry?  Hide?  Play it up?  Pretend it didn't happen?"

My big sister ran back stage with this horrific look on her face, like I broke my leg.  (No pun intended).  And I got a lot of, "I'm sooo sorry!"

Usually I like being the center of sympathy, but not when it comes to acting.

I went to bed praying, "God, why did I mess up?  Was there a point to this?"

He sent me a fast reply.

Just that talent show day, I was reciting the 'all the worlds a stage' line in front of a small group.  I don't want to forget that line, I'm passionate about it.  

I forgot that I'm not always going to succeed in the things I'm passionate about, especially the things I'm really passionate about, like acting.  I've been cocky.

And you know what?  God got my point across, with not even half a poem.  Maybe twenty-five words.  And that's it.  It didn't matter that some people didn't listen because the mess up was too distracting. Some people actually listened to those few stumbled words, and they told me so.  One of my favorite actor/musicians also told me this, which made me extremely happy.